Mr. Don’t Know It All

I was reminded how incredible our community of children’s leaders are this week. I also was reminded how much I don’t know and need others around me who can speak into my life.

We had a family in our church experience a tragedy—the loss of a young boy’s mother. His father—an incredibly godly man—came into my office to tell me and ask for help on how and what he should say to his son. I starred at him like a deer looking into headlights. I was first stunned that this had just happened and then panicked inside because I had no idea what to say or how to help him. To this point, I have never had to deal with this.

It was at this point I could’ve chosen one of two things:

1. Tell him the truth that I don’t know what to do
2. Lie my way through and act like I know what I’m doing

Trust me, both options were in play. I decided to tell him the truth. I told him that this is the first time anyone has asked me this. I didn’t leave it at that though. I didn’t pass him off to another pastor. I told him that I’m here for him and I’m going to help him.

This is where our amazing community of children’s pastors/leaders came in to play. I sent a text to some friends asking their help and THEY RESPONDED. Some had no idea; while others gave great advice. I ended up calling a mother in Tulsa, OK whom I had never met, but heard she went through something similar—the loss of her children’s father. She walked me through what she did and all the feelings that surrounded her situation. It was extremely helpful.

I don’t enjoy these times because my heart aches for these kids and families. However, God reminded me why He called me to do what I do. It’s not about the programming. It’s not about the lesson. It’s about people. It’s about being there for that family, that little boy whose life will never be the same!



  1. Justyn, your transparency is so encouraging! It’s not a matter of knowing it all. It’s a matter of caring, loving, putting our arm around and showing compassion. It’s all about we, not you and me!

  2. Great Post, these type challanges somehow get left out of the interview process. You did the right thing.

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